positivity in control
Like you may know I am not an expert on this topic and don’t claim to be. I just want to share my experience and what helps me turn situations that could bring me down into the best possible situation and stay there. I am on this journey to make the best out of every situation because I know that’s how I can live the life I want to live. I am not perfect in doing this in any way shape or form and I am not even close to it and I probably will never be, that’s why it’s called a journey. I can only strive to be as good as I can and allow myself to be. Like everybody else I struggle with this concept of being positive a thousand times a day and I can tell you that I am winning a lot of these battles but not even close to all of them. If I know one thing about myself is that I am one stubborn son of a b**** and won’t stop chasing my goals even if it’s not totally reachable. I am choosing to do my best and be okay with wherever that brings me. I want to give you a glance into what helps me be positive and hopefully this little blog will help you out in some way(s). This blog is short because I don’t want to go to deep and I wrote this while being on the plane coming back from Ireland.
You must have heard things like: look on the bright side or just think about the positives of the situation. That’s great and all but these are just principles that someone else is throwing at you and hope you catch it. But this won’t work if there’s not a motive and reason within yourself to back this up. What reasons can you think of and what morals do you have that can push you to see things with a positive mind set? I just can’t fathom how I am supposed to be and stay positive because someone else told me to be. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t encourage people to be positive and happy because sometimes it’s you telling and supporting them that will light that spark inside and make the journey easier. Imagine someone asking you to get on a train without a reason to, would you do it? I assume you would only get on because you had reason to do so and knew where you were going. In this case you would get on and stay there until you reach whatever you need to reach. If you do not know why you’re doing something, just like getting on that train without a reason, you will eventually get off because there’s no reason to stay on. So giving yourself that reason to be positive is key. Of course this is not me saying that you should look at things in a negative way but your positive mindset is only going to last so long if you just do it for someone else. What are you going to do when nobody is around and all you can see is difficult situations and negative energy? You will have to look within yourself and rely on yourself to change that mindset. Whether you can find that motivation within is going to make the difference between being positive for a little while or whenever you choose to be. This sounds like it’s all up to you? And yes it is. One of the things I use every day and I touched on this a little bit earlier is, I am going as far as I allow myself to go. There’s no we or us in this. Like anyone else I am experiencing a lot of frustrating and negative situations throughout the day, But whether I let that cloud my judgement and response to that is up to me. Another method that is linked together wit the previous one and that I use every day is, however I think about this thing that I am feeling and react to it is only going to affect my positive thinking. Because I don’t have control over what other people are doing or thinking. Do I have control over what happens next? No? then it’s time for me to let go and focus on me and what I do have control over. It’s the same thing from the external side, what are you going to do when external forces tell you to be positive, be happy or whatever it is that they’re telling you. It’s your choice to let these emotions, thoughts and ideas run and let them run however you want them to run. Because this is all within your control, you can choose what to do with it.
Like the two examples I used above I have different motivations and morals that I rely on throughout the day and I use many more like the ones I just used but that shouldn’t matter to you. Because whether those methods work is up to you and the person you are. This is dictated by what morals beliefs and standards you got. Whatever the methods are that work for you, those are the once you should be focused on and the once that truly matter. The next thing I am going to say might be controversial but I am trying my very best to live that way. If the method(s) or the situation that you’re in now don’t make you happy or help you get better in life, it’s time to move on and look for something that does fulfill your needs and are up to your happiness standards. This works for me right now.
I might not be in the situation I want to be in now but I am using these methods to TRY and make the best out of my days. Because I still have control over how I Feel and react to this. And it might seem strange but the reason why I am positive about my situation right now is because I know this is temporarily (another method I use daily). And who knows when my life changes and the situation changes all of these methods that I am using will have to change and I will just have to adjust as well as I can. As I wrote in my last blog, everyone is different and reacts differently to everything that’s happening, but this might help you if you need it. I wrote this from my beliefs and point of view and felt like sharing it with you. If this helps you and works for you than I am happy that I could help.
2 of the books I recently read and have had a huge impact on me and this blog are:
Chasing excellence by Ben Bergeron
Can’t hurt me by David Goggins
If you got the time, take that time and read these books because they’re so powerfull and motivating.